Life is What You Bake It
I eagerly anticipated finding my man and celebrating with family and friends. I also had the dream that I would meet my man on the first day of college. I had this great story concocted in my mind where I would be walking on the college steps (looking for college steps was obviously a must when I was checking out colleges), and being a bit klutzy that I am, I would trip and fall. My papers and books would go scattering everywhere. Who needs book bags when you can carry your weight in books? And as I was gathering my things and trying not to cry in embarrassment, I would feel a rush of someone running to help me. And there he would be. He would say something to make me laugh instead of cry. I would look into his beautiful eyes, and I would just know that this was the guy. Being the gentleman that he is, he would walk me to wherever I was going (carrying my books of course), and by the end of our little walk together, he would have asked me out on a proper date. (You know the one where the guy asks the girl out, picks her up in his car, and whisks her away to an adventure that he has planned that could be as simple as a walk through the park before finally returning her home and walking her safely to her doorstep.) And I was going to marry this guy.
Well, I finished college, and sadly, I did not trip with a handsome man running to my rescue. Oh I tripped plenty, but none with any sweet romantic gestures--just my wounded pride. My story did not unfold as I thought it would. I remained single. I kept hoping every January first that this would be the year where I would meet my guy and finally finally get my red shiny Kitchen Aid mixer.
My twenties came and went, and I was still single. It did not look like I would be getting my red Kitchen Aid mixer anytime soon.
Early on in my life, my mom and grandma taught me everything that I know about baking. I love to bake. I bake cookies, brownies, pies, bread--what I like to affectionately call "comfort baked goods." Often when I was feeling stressed and overwhelmed, I would bake. Then, I would take these treats and hand them out to people. The joy on people's faces when I asked them if they wanted a chocolate chip cookie always filled me with joy as I forgot whatever I was stressed about. I call myself a baker; in fact, I had the grand scheme that if the whole teaching thing did not work out, I would open my own bakery. So you can see why the Red Kitchen Aid mixer was so important.
When I turned 31, something clicked.
Why was I waiting to get my Kitchen Aid mixer? Why did I feel like I needed to be getting married in order to get this tool? I had always dreamed of it being gifted to me, so I started saving up my credit card points to buy my red Kitchen Aid mixer and gift it to myself. Finally, I had enough.
The day that I went to the store and gifted myself a brand new, shiny candy apple red Kitchen Aid mixer, I will not forget. I had to fight back tears. I pushed thoughts aside of giving up on my dream as I reminded myself the joy that I would bring to others with my baking made with my red Kitchen Aid mixer. I remember the first batch of treats that I baked, the people I gave them to, and the pride that I felt saying, "I made these with my Kitchen Aid mixer."
Today, my red Kitchen Aid mixer sits beautifully on my counter. It is a reminder to myself that though I am single, God is still working in my life. I don't need to put my life on hold because there is no mister. In fact, lately I have been reading through James. James 1:17 states, "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows."
God gives us good gifts. He knows what we need and what we want. If there is something that I deem as a gift (marriage and children) and he has not yet given it to me, that means it is not a good gift for me right now. Instead, I can focus on the gift that God has given me right now: singleness. With this comes more time. I can use my time to serve those around me. I can bake for others to be an encouragement to them. I can spend focused time with my students outside of the classroom at their sporting events or plays. I can be that listening ear to that friend who is struggling. I can love on and spend one-on-one time with my dear nieces and nephews. Singleness is not the gift I wanted, but God knows that for this season, it is good.
This past year, there were so many moments that I got into my head. I questioned God as to why I was still single. In those times of calling out to God, God showed me so many passages of encouragement in times of waiting. Isaiah 41 was especially encouraging.
Verses 8-10 states,
But you, Israel, my servant,
Jacob, whom I have chosen,
the offspring of Abraham, my friend;
9 you whom I took from the ends of the earth,
and called from its farthest corners,
saying to you, “You are my servant,
I have chosen you and not cast you off”;
10 fear not, for I am with you;
be not dismayed, for I am your God;
I will strengthen you, I will help you,
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Not only does this passage speak of the strength that God brings, it says how He has chosen His people. We are not cast off. What an encouragement this was to me when I was crying out to God, "Why won't anyone choose me?" He gently showed me that He has chosen me. In fact, when He came to this world as a baby to ultimately die on the cross, He chose you too.
Later, in verse 13, the Bible states,
For I, the Lord your God,
hold your right hand;
it is I who say to you, “Fear not,
I am the one who helps you.
God holds our hand. When I am longing for a man to reach over and take my hand, I can seek comfort knowing that God already does that. He promises peace from fear because He helps us.
Further down in Isaiah 41:17-20, it states
When the poor and needy seek water,
and there is none,
and their tongue is parched with thirst,
I the Lord will answer them;
I the God of Israel will not forsake them.
18 I will open rivers on the bare heights,
and fountains in the midst of the valleys.
I will make the wilderness a pool of water,
and the dry land springs of water.
19 I will put in the wilderness the cedar,
the acacia, the myrtle, and the olive.
I will set in the desert the cypress,
the plane and the pine together,
20 that they may see and know,
may consider and understand together,
that the hand of the Lord has done this,
the Holy One of Israel has created it.
As I read this, I was struck by the seeming impossibility of some of the situations. Water where there is none, big healthy trees in the middle of the desert. In our human minds, this is impossible, but God assures us that He will do the impossible.
Why though will God wait for the times in the desert? Because of the seeming impossibility, we can proudly proclaim that the Lord has done this. When a situation in our life feels impossible, we know that God is at work. While actively waiting for a husband in my 30s seems impossible, when I am married with children, I can look back and see how it was all for His good. And if I never get married and have children, God is still good.
Maybe you are waiting for other impossible things. You are waiting for a child, a restored relationship, the salvation of a loved one. What seems impossible to you, God will use for His glory so that we can all proclaim, "Look at what the Lord has done!"
During this time of year, I always reread the Christmas story. The entire Christmas story is about waiting for the seemingly impossible. I have a soft spot for Elizabeth and Zechariah (I wrote a devotional a few years ago if you would like to check it out). This couple was righteous before God. In fact, what a testimony to be thus remembered in the Bible.
The next verse breaks my heart a bit as the Bible shares that they were without children. As I read through it again this year, I was struck by Luke 1:13 when the angel appears to Zechariah, "But the angel said to him: “Do not be afraid, Zechariah; your prayer has been heard. Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you are to call him John."
The angel announced to Zechariah that his prayer had been heard. This means that Zechariah and Elizabeth had been praying for a child. They had probably been praying for years. They had been eagerly waiting for God to hear their prayers. But after years of no response and they had both gotten older, I bet they stopped praying for a child. And yet, the angel announces that God heard their prayer, and they were to have a child.
Just to clarify, they did not have what they had been praying for because they were not seeking God enough. Instead, they had to wait for a baby to give God the ultimate glory. They had a baby even though it was physically impossible. And they were able to rejoice and in that moment say, "God has done the impossible!"
I don't know what you all are struggling with as we end 2025 and begin 2026, but I pray that you find comfort knowing that God is the God of the impossible. He meets us where we are at and grows us so that His perfect will can be done.
Many of you commented on how encouraging my November thankfulness posts were to you. I am so grateful that they were uplifting. If I am being honest, they stemmed from a place of deep discouragement about my relationship status. In that month though, as I chose to focus on what I was grateful for, my mindset shifted. It went from focused on what I don't have (a husband and children) to the many blessings that God has given me. He has given me a wonderful family, an uplifting school filled with students, families, and co-workers, and incredibly close friends who encourage me when I am feeling down, make me laugh, and cover me in their prayers.
As I shift into 2026, I am going to keep this momentum up by filling a jar with a sticky note every day about what I am grateful for. I look forward to December 31, 2026 to look back and see all that the Lord has done. I am going to keep baking and sharing my treats with the help of my red Kitchen Aid mixer, and I will continue to try new things. Most importantly, I will continue to allow God's will to be done.
(Now before I conclude, I just want to clarify, I have not given up the dream of getting married and having children. In fact, I still have that hope that maybe this will be the year. And I will also say that if you know a kind eligible young man who is a Christian looking for a wife, feel free to set me up because who knows if you will not act as the hands and feet of God to have His will be done. Or if you are a young man waiting to ask me out, here's your chance!)
A few years ago, my sister got me an ornament that is a mini mixer, and it says, "Life is what you bake it." And it sits next to my big mixer as a reminder that I choose joy. I choose to trust God's timing is best (He is the God of the impossible), and I choose to live without waiting for "my life to start." I chose to buy a Kitchen Aid mixer to use every moment to its fullest.
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